I find it interesting that the God of the universe speaks through a "still small voice". You'd think it would be easier for Him to just come out and talk to us like we talk to one another. But then, maybe, that's the point. How often do we go through our busy days, talking but not being listened to? Or even worse, others are speaking to us and we're the ones not listening. The few places in the bible where God does speak audibly to the masses, the masses freak out. But I believe that God is speaking, even today. And I want to recount the first time I heard His voice.
It was a morning in mid-February of 2017 and I was in the shower. I had some Christian music playing in the background and I was singing along when I heard a distinct voice tell me not to worry about things around the house that coming weekend, that He had control of everything and all would be alright. We had had some interesting things going on around the house: a mouse that we weren't able to catch and a water heater that wasn't really heating and I was preparing to go to serve on a weekend men's retreat, a Walk to Emmaus. Basically, His voice said, "Don't worry, I got this."
Now when I say I "heard" His voice, it wasn't audible to those around me. But I could hear Him speaking to me, just as I hear my own thoughts. It was different than hearing my own thoughts because these words were not coming from me, my thoughts, or even my imagination. They were just there. I know, it's strange to say, I'm hearing voices, but a voice I heard.
When I got out of the shower and got dressed for the day, I told my wife about it. She said that she often hears God speaking to her in the shower. I guess He's got a captive audience. So I started talking to the voice, and He answered. I had some errands to run that morning, and so I invited God to go with me. He talked to me and carried on a conversation, just like I'm carrying on with you right now. The first errand, I had to pick up a few items from the grocery store, so God and I went shopping. I was buying some snacks for the upcoming weekend and thought I'd by things like cookies and chips. But then I thought, "Hey, God is with me. Why don't I ask Him what I should buy?" As soon as I asked, He told me to buy bottled water, bananas, apples, oranges, and nuts. Who am I to argue, so I picked out the items and headed to the checkout.
The other errands I had on my list were to fill up with fuel, get some money from the ATM and grab some lunch. So, just like I did with the groceries, I asked Him what I should do next and He said let's fuel up the car. While I was at the gas station, I asked Him what next, and He said - "let's get some lunch." I asked where and He instructed me to go have a nice Greek lunch. When I left the restaurant, I asked about finding the nearest ATM, but God said for me to get on the highway and start driving.
Now at the time, I had been reading and listening to the bible. So I hooked up my audio bible and started listening as I drove. It wasn't long before my mind started to wander from the audio bible and He nudged me back by saying, "Listen to My word." This happened a few times, but He never got stern or angry with me - only nudging my attention "back to His word." Then something really cool happened. As I listened to the bible, I started to hear the narrator - the exact voice and version of scripture - in my head, just a split second before it came out of the speakers in my car. Wow! As I drove down the highway, I listened to about 30 chapters of the bible, all in my head, just ahead of the speakers. It was like the old monster truck commercials, "Sunday, Sunday, Sunday..."
A few days after I returned from working the Walk to Emmaus (which was an awesome weekend, by the way), I started every morning with a cup of coffee and devotional at my breakfast table. My wife and I were babysitting our grandson Jaxon during the day, and his mom would drop him off about the time I was starting my devotional. About the time I would start to pray, Jaxon would come over and climb up into my lap and hug on me while I prayed. As soon as I would say "amen", Jaxon would echo "amen" and then climb down. It was a lot of fun watching him do this day after day.
Toward the end of the month, I was watching a DVD lesson on spiritual healing. The lecturer talked about a time when she needed inner healing and told about how her secular friends would tell her to "get over it" or "snap out of it" or "pull yourself up by your bootstraps". At the same time, her Christian friends were saying things like "you need to pray more" or "you need to dive into the scriptures". No one ever suggested that she should ask for inner healing. At about this same time, I had started reading the book of Job, when I realized that Job not only needed physical healing - he was infested with sores - but he needed emotional healing: he had lost all of his children and belongings. He also needed spiritual deliverance, since he was under attack from satan. Yet his friends were saying essentially the same thing that the woman in the DVD had recounted - "he needed to pull himself up by his bootstraps and get over it" or he "needed to pray more". This "a-ha" while reading the book of Job (which, by the way, is one of my new favorite bible stories) really opened my eyes to what scripture has to say. In fact, looking back on this event, over a year later, I realize how much the Holy Spirit reveals to us while we read God's word. But this has only come to me after a year of intense study and journaling about my experiences.
Then my wife did it. She took me to a class about "seers" and "feelers". Before I go on, a seer is someone who is able to see with their spiritual eyes (or, as the bible describes, the eyes of their heart). Feelers are people who can experience physical sensations that are echoes of what is happening in the spiritual realm. Now up to this point, I've told you about visions that I've experienced. Those are experiences of a "seer". In this post, I've shared how I've "heard", so I've had experiences of a "hearer". For me, this class on seers and feelers, taught by Dan McCollam, was like a kindergartner getting dropped off in a post-doctoral class in rocket surgery. I furiously took notes, but still not understanding half of what was said.
At the conclusion of the class, the pastor of the host church approached me and said that he had a word for me - that I was a "pioneer". He said he didn't know what that meant, but he shared it with me and I accepted it. Later that afternoon, I was at a coffee shop with Michelle, reading about Dan and his home church - Mission Vacaville in California. I was browsing their statement of faith, titled "decisions that define us", and found the following:
" We have decided to value both pioneers and settlers - pioneers to expand our territory and settlers to build on those territories - but we are not squatters - people who take up space others have fought for without improving it."
This was the very first prophetic word that I had received. I wasn't totally sure what it meant, but it sounded exciting. Little did I know what territory expansion was really like, but I was about to find out. Come back next time as I share more of my charismatic journey with you.
~~Ken
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