Catching Up

Mountains and Valley Landscape - from MaxPixel

      I haven't written much over the past several months since life, as it frequently does, got in the way. My most recent post about fear may provide you some insight into how life "got in the way," but at this time, I don't feel like sharing the details. Nevertheless, my personal quest still continues.

     When I last wrote about my charismatic journey, I told you about a time where I actually heard the internal voice of God and I shared with you my first prophetic experience. These events took place in February of 2017.

      Then I recapped my year from September 2017 through May of 2018. Because of my heartwarming experience, and because of the various ways I started to encounter and experience God, I dove head-first into a growing pathway called The Austin School of Supernatural Ministry or (AuSSM - pronounced 'awesome'). While in AuSSM I certainly experienced more of a supernatural lifestyle. Yet, the focus of the school is not teaching me how to pursue miracles, but rather, how to pursue God. Miracles are great and wonderful, but so much more so is the source of the miraculous.

      Much of my first year in AuSSM was spent in understanding my identity as a child of God. The most wonderful news: we are all children of God. Even those who don't believe or who openly hate and despise God. In 1 Samuel 16:7, God rebukes Samuel for looking on the outward appearance, but rather He (God) looks at the heart. When was the last time you looked at someone and only saw "what was on the outside?"

      I remember, one time, walking through a shopping center and people watching. It's a favorite pastime of mine. As I watched people going about their errands, I caught my thoughts: "Look at those tattoos!", "Look at the color of her hair!", "Look at those piercings!" In a moment, I changed those thoughts and instead said: "Look at that daughter of God!", "Look at that son of God!" Suddenly, I had a different heart toward total strangers. Yes, they may have had tattoos, or odd-colored hair, or piercings - those are facts and certainly true. However, as I started to see them and declare that they are children - sons and daughters - of God, I experienced a love that, for me, was like the love God feels for me. I was seeing people through His eyes. That began to change how I felt the way that God feels about me. I am His child, too. Even though there are times where I may not feel worthy. Even though I may feel like He can't love me or I feel unlovable, He loves me still. There is an old hymn, "He Is With Me Still", that echoes this same truth:

"But whatever may betide,

He is walking by my side,

And by this I know He loves me still."

      Growing in the understanding of who I am, and whose I am, began a transformation from just "knowing" that God loves me into an experience of His love for me. It was finally "out of my head" and "into my heart." All my life, I "knew" that God loved me, but for most of my life, I never "felt" like God liked me. My best analogy, and it is a poor one at that, is God is invisible and seated on His throne somewhere "out there". Just like the Abraham Lincoln memorial, God was gigantic, cold as stone, sitting on His throne in Heaven.

Lincoln Statue - Wikipedia - Do you see God like this?

But now, I see Him as someone that I can experience. I can feel His love and hear His voice and know that He loves me. I can experience Him as a "daddy" and not just a "father".

      I've been told all my life that the good news of the gospel was that Jesus died for my sins. But I think the better news of the gospel is that God loves me. He's a dad whose children have run away and He just wants His kids back. For me, that is good news. I have experienced Him through various, and to some - strange, ways. I've heard His voice. I've experienced Him in dreams and visions. I've felt Him through electricity and laughter. I've felt His encouragement through the love of others and I've been able to share His love, to me and through me, with others.

      I recently came to the conclusion that if I had experienced God only through His heartwarming nudge back in December of 2016, it would be enough. Yet He overwhelms me, time and time again, through repeated experiential encounters. He is infinite. I am finite. I can explore His goodness and mercy and love for all eternity and never experience all of Him.

      Have you had an experiential encounter with God? Do you feel that God loves (and likes) you or do you just "know" that He does? Do you see yourself as His beloved child? Do you view others as His beloved children? If you answered "no" to any (or all) of these questions, I would challenge you to pursue Him with your "yes" to these questions. He's right there in your situation and in your life and He loves you beyond measure.

~~Ken